What is it about trans bodies that make cis people want to be so gatekeepy?

So, I mostly interact with the world as an androgynous person, because I’m still a wig sister (hair is coming back) and a brick, and some days I don’t want to get dolled up to go to fucking Wal-Mart. Like what?

But the longer I continue on HRT the more comfortable I am presenting the way I wish. I spent all week in the world as my authentic self, drawing cis folks' looks and confusion.

I started at a low dosage (1 mg per day, 100mg spiro, 100mg protest) and over the first six months increased it, so it wasn’t until say seven months in that my t bottomed out, so my breasts came in late.

Now that my breasts are well amazing and small and perky and all mine, at home, and sometimes when I’m out, I like wearing a cami top under an open button-down blouse. My spouse strongly requested me to cover it up and has expressed strong transphobic feelings about how my body has changed.

How my body makes another person feel is not my problem.

How you feel about my body is not my problem.

So much for a supportive spouse, an ally. Ha!

Her timing was perfect, as I am in my PMS down cycle where I’m moody, constipated, crampy, and prone to headaches, plus my boobs are extra tender and swollen. So I felt like I kept my cool as I have only had ten months of practice dealing with this new operating system.

I wanted to yell, and scream, but I didn’t. I have stayed away. I feel like if my body bothers you so bad, I’m not going to be around you. I have been nice and have given her hugs and affection when she asked for it. But I have not been freely giving the love.

We have nearly 30 years together, and perhaps this is how it ends, in a slow drawn-out breakup as I continue to follow my happiness.

I’m not giving up any of this. It is death to go back.

Anyhow, as always: be gay, do crimes.